


Tumblr Misc: Supernatural

by A_Diamond



Series: Tumblr Misc [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Ficlet Collection, M/M, Originally Posted on Tumblr, chapters tagged individually
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-01
Updated: 2018-03-27
Packaged: 2018-09-13 19:46:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,754
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9139582
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/A_Diamond/pseuds/A_Diamond
Summary: Collection of Supernatural ficlets/drabbles/notfic originally from Tumblr. Tags and warnings for each will be in the chapter summaries.





	1. You're in My Body

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Warnings/tags:** Dean/Castiel/Jimmy, human AU, twincest/sibling incest, established relationship, body swap, light dom/sub
> 
> Originally posted [here](http://alxdiamond.tumblr.com/post/155226122448/we-are-siblings-and-had-our-bodies-swapped-the)

Cas and Jimmy don’t even realize that somehow, something has gone supernaturally awry and they’ve switched bodies. Because who would even think of that, right? They got a little drunk, a little celebratory, and they wake up in a naked pile on the couch without the slightest idea anything’s different.

Cas-in-Jimmy goes to Cas’s room and puts on Cas’s clothes. Jimmy-in-Cas goes to Jimmy’s room and puts on Jimmy’s clothes. They go about their day as normal.

* * *

Then Dean comes over, takes one look at his boyfriends, and says, “What’s with the switcheroo?”

“What?” Jimmy asks.

Dean gestures between the two of them. “You’re wearing Jimmy’s clothes, and he’s wearing yours.”

“No,” Cas says slowly. “I’m not Jimmy, and I’m wearing my clothes.”

Dean actually looks annoyed. “Come on, guys. I thought we were past the testing-Dean’s-twin-recognition part of this relationship.”

“And I thought we were past the Dean-failing-to-recognize-that-his-lovers-are-different-people part of this relationship,” Cas shoots back, his tone matching Dean’s precisely. He’s always been quicker to anger than Jimmy, especially when it comes to the two of them being treated as interchangeable. He got into more than a few fights in school because of it.

“See, that’s exactly what I’m talking about.” Dean’s fully engaged now, taking a few steps towards Cas and jabbing a grumpy finger at him. “You’re trying to act like Cas, but I fuckin’ know you, Jimmy.”

“Apparently not,” Jimmy grumbles. He’s starting to get irritated, too. He doesn’t take being mistaken for his twin personally, as a general rule, but it’s true that Dean hasn’t misidentified them in months. And his insistence that they’re messing with him, instead of acknowledging and apologizing for his mistake, is quickly moving from ‘obnoxious’ territory into ‘we’ve dumped people for less.’

Dean stares from Jimmy to Cas, then back to Jimmy. “Seriously, guys? All right, I guess we’re doing this.” He gets right in Cas’s space and touches the corner of his eye, gentle despite his frustration. “Jimmy. Your crow’s feet aren’t as deep as Cas’s, and you have that little scar…” He traces down Cas’s cheek to the nearly invisible line just at the edge of his jaw, where Jimmy split his chin in a childhood biking accident. Cas doesn’t have that scar, and yet there it is.

“Holy shit,” Jimmy breathes. The other two men turn to him and he takes the opportunity to study Cas closely, which he hadn’t had any reason to do before. It’s different than seeing himself in the mirror, and different than seeing Cas. He’s looking at himself from the outside and it’s deeply unsettling. His face is scrutinizing him right back.

“Oh,” Cas says with Jimmy’s mouth, “fuck.”

* * *

“I can’t believe you guys didn’t notice you weren’t in your own bodies.” Dean’s very clearly trying not to laugh, a little amusement and a lot of hysteria. “Also, what the fuck?”

“I have no idea,” Jimmy starts, but he’s cut off when Cas, out of nowhere, grabs the front of his shirt and hauls him in for a kiss. It’s deep and fierce, Cas's—Jimmy’s?—tongue claiming Jimmy’s (Cas’s own) mouth as a hand slides over to pinch and roll at his nipple. Jimmy’s knees buckle, but Cas holds him up, keeps on kissing and toying with him until Jimmy’s so breathless his vision greys out a little.

When he pulls away, the smug look on the face he’s borrowed somehow from Jimmy is 100% Cas.

“You’re in my body,” Cas growls, and it’s possessive but not angry. “When I fuck you, I’m going to know all the tricks and all the spots that will drive you out of your mind with pleasure. I’ll read every shiver and whimper and know _exactly_ what you’re feeling.”

“Oh fuck,” Jimmy says again, though it’s a very different sort of exhalation this time.

“Fuck yes,” Dean says, reaching down to unbutton his fly where he’s already starting to harden.

Swapping bodies may be the weirdest fucking thing that’s ever happened to the Novak twins, and they may not know how or why or what they need to do to get back to themselves, but they can figure it out later. And maybe figure out a way to do it again, at will, because it turns out to be pretty fucking amazing, too.


	2. Deadpool AU

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Warnings/tags:** Violence, implied prostitution, endverse Cas, hitman Dean
> 
> Originally posted [here]()

Me & Cas, man, it was love at first sight.

I was having a drink or five at Benny’s, flush with both cash and the satisfaction of a morally sound but legally questionable job well done, when something shook the bar hard enough to knock my whiskey off. After shedding a tear and saying Kaddish for the senseless loss, I looked over to see who had dared murder an innocent double malt before I could welcome it into the Valhalla of my body, and that’s when I saw him.

Dark, wild hair. The kinda scruff that gives you beard burn in all the best places. A light blue shirt that rode up along his back as he held down the huge biker he’d slammed face-first into the bar.

“If I wanted to eat old ugly ass for free, I’d visit Grandpa in the nursing home,” he growled in a deep, rough voice that suggested he spent a helluva lot of time with his mouth on some kinda body part, or at least that he had done recently.

Old Ugly Ass’s friends were coming over, and the new-found love of my life might’ve been a bad ass, but there was only one of him and about twenty of the other other guys.

Naturally, I leapt to his defense. He didn’t swoon, exactly, but he did nod at me all friendly-like when it became clear I was there to help, not join in the gangbang. Warmed the cockles of my heart, that nod did.

“So,” I suggested, eyeing the oncoming group, “if we survive this, what do you say we—”

“No.”

“How about a pity-slash-gratitude handjob?”

“Am I the pity or the gratitude?”

“Pity. I mean, I’m the pity. I mean, you pity me, so you give me a handjob and I’m very very grateful.”

“Fifty bucks and I’ll think about it,” he said as he threw the first punch, which I was pretty sure meant we were gonna get married.


	3. Second Base

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Warnings/tags:** High school AU, Dean in panties
> 
> Originally posted [here]()

This really wasn’t how he’d wanted Cas to find out.

He’d planned to tell him—to show him, really, he honestly had. Just not like this, and not yet. He thought maybe they could get to second base, maybe he could get Cas’s hand down his pants, before getting into the details of what he had under those pants. So wasn’t it ironic, or something, that his plans had been ruined by slicing himself open on literal second base?

The school nurse finished cutting a line down the left hip of his baseball pants and pulled the two sides away, revealing the long, bloody gash. Also revealed was the shiny green satin of the panties he had on, the same shade as the lettering on Lawrence High’s uniforms. They were supposed to be his lucky pair for game days.

Rowena made a little startled sound, a quiet hum of surprise, before her face smoothed out and she got to work cleaning the wound without comment.

He couldn’t look at his boyfriend. He’d wanted Cas to be there, but that was before he knew he’d be unwittingly showing off his little fetish. Instead, cheeks nearly as red as the skin around his cut, he asked Rowena, “You won’t... You don’t have to tell anyone, right? Like, my parents?” At least it had happened during warm-up, so his family wasn’t at the field yet.

She tutted. “Of course not, dear. I don’t see that it’s anyone’s business, yours truly included. The lack of functional pants might prove a wee bit of a problem for you there, though.”

Cas cleared his throat and Dean finally braved a glance. He didn’t look upset or anything, at least. “I have some spare shorts in my gym locker,” he said. “I could get them?”

When Dean nodded, Cas started to leave, then turned back and took the few steps over to Dean’s side. He leaned down and kissed Dean’s forehead, then whispered, “If you ever want to show me, I bet you look so pretty,” right in his ear.

Thank God, Rowena didn’t comment on what that revealed under his pants, either.


	4. Grindr Inches

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Warnings/tags:** Human AU, weatherman Cas, notfic
> 
> Originally posted [here](http://alxdiamond.tumblr.com/post/158666983748/punchsportsandpunchlines-veltish-zamaron)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Written in response to this image:  
> 

  * Cas never really got around to “coming out” at work. He’s not _closeted_ , it just hasn’t come up. Seeing as he’s not planning to sleep with any of his coworkers, what does it matter to them?  

  * He’s also not a size queen. There’s no correlation between his most satisfying sexual experiences and the size of his partners’ dicks.  

  * But he could chart the line between dishonesty and failed relationships with his eyes closed, so that’s a deal breaker for him.
  * So when it’s broken three deals in a row and he hasn’t gotten laid for a week and a half
  * and he just found out his train has been cancelled in fear of the upcoming storm so he’s stuck at the station
  * with no hope of breaking that breaking streak,
  * he might maybe get a little bit salty about it.
  * He doesn’t get fired, though Chuck does yell at him for an hour.
  * He deletes the tweet, but not before it’s been immortalized in the annals of internet history.
  * (He is neither regretful nor ashamed. Viewership spikes 300% in the next week, and even when it tapers down, it’s up from before.)
  * It’s nearly two months later when he meets Dean at a bar. The man is charming. He’s direct with his flirting and his face is an open book. He’s funny and gorgeous and more than a little filthy.
  * He’s exactly Cas’s type.
  * They leave separately that night (Cas has to be at work in five hours and should get some sleep) but he gives Dean his phone so Dean can enter his number in it.
  * When he checks the next day, though, he doesn’t find anything listed under “Dean.”
  * He’s disappointed and honestly pissed, because he thought they were having a good time and Dean could’ve just said he wasn’t interested instead of messing around with his phone for two minutes to avoid giving him an honest brush off.
  * That night, after stewing all day, he gets a text: **drinks sat? 9 @ the rooster?**
  * The number it comes from is saved in his phone as “Virginia Beach.”
  * (It’s not a lie.)




End file.
